


love takes work

by crystal-peridot (captaintomysky)



Series: Love Takes Time/Love Takes Work [2]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, abuse & anxiety mentions, implied rosepearl, rose diamond theory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-08
Updated: 2015-07-08
Packaged: 2018-04-08 09:40:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 11,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4299915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captaintomysky/pseuds/crystal-peridot
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loving yourself takes the most work of all.</p><p>A story about how Sapphire and Ruby might have met.</p><p>These stories can be read in any order.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I've still got my fingers crossed for a flashback to how Ruby and Sapphire met in Stevenbomb 3. Until then, I wrote this.
> 
> This is a companion fic to "Love Takes Time", which has the same storyline but is written in Sapphire's POV. I'd highly recommend reading both. Link to the series is above.
> 
> Listen to the 8tracks playlist: [here](http://8tracks.com/captaintomysky/love-takes-time-love-takes-work)

Ruby trembled and pressed her knuckles against the stone below her, hard, in place of punching it with all her strength. Its coolness only served to agitate her further. She wanted to scream.

She had always known she was small. And that her gem wasn't on the center line like everyone else's. And she had always known that the other gems didn't think she should be fighting.

But Rose Quartz had always believed in her.

Rose Quartz was the only leader she'd ever served who had never made her stay behind from a battle because of her size. Until now. No matter that she could put a crack in the stone beneath her if she wanted to.

Unable to contain her anger in silence, Ruby pulled the pillow off her bed and screamed into it.

She could have predicted that this would happen eventually. _You'd think I would know better by now_ , she thought. Now that she'd let it out, her anger began to slowly drain from her, to be replaced with sadness. Even though she was more valued and accepted here than on Homeworld, she had been a fool to hope that anything would truly change.

As if in sympathy, the scratch in her gem sent another wave of aching pain through her form.

Ruby shifted so she could see out the window. In the lawn below, the number of tents had already halved. Gems would soon begin to assemble on the far end of the lawn, and they would all be gone not long after that.

Who knew how long it would be until Rose Quartz's force returned and Ruby could fight again.

She had betrayed Homeworld to come here. What was the point if she wasn't even allowed to help?

She curled up in her bed and cried.

~*~

Ruby left her room only to attend a tactical meeting that evening. It was the first she'd ever been invited to. A tiny part of her was thrilled at the opportunity to be so close to Rose Quartz. The rest of her was horrified at the prospect of showing her face after the rest of the troops had left. Everyone would soon know that Rose Quartz thought she was too weak for battle, exactly like everyone else.

In the halls, the sound of each footstep echoing off the walls served as another reminder that this place was almost completely deserted now. She couldn't see another gem in any direction. She forced down her increasing sense of despair. She would be at the meeting soon, and the last thing she needed was for the entire world to know she was upset.

The meeting was held in a large room, filled with chairs facing one long table at the front. Ruby was among the last of the gems to arrive. She sat in the back of the room and spoke to no one. The room wasn't even a quarter full, and the rows and rows of empty chairs behind her made her feel exposed. She didn't recognize any of these gems, save Rose Quartz and the pearl, who were seated at the table with what Ruby could only assume were other high-ranking officials. Some part of her had hoped she would get the chance to receive an explanation from Rose Quartz for why she was here; even though she knew it was probably because of what had happened the previous day, she couldn't dismiss the knowledge that Rose Quartz had never treated her like this before, and that perhaps this time really _was_ different--perhaps there had been another reason.

The pearl stood and began the meeting by thanking everyone for coming, and then launched immediately into detailed explanations of possible future strategies. Rose Quartz hadn't said a word, she just watched the pearl speak with an expression of absolute fascination. The remainder of those seated at the table just looked bored. Except--

A chill ran down Ruby's spine. The small blue gem at the end of the table was staring directly at her. Ruby could feel her gaze even though her eyes were covered by her hair. She hadn't noticed this gem before the meeting, but now that she had seen her, everything about her was instantly familiar. The blue gem quickly averted her gaze and turned instead toward the pearl, who at that moment drew a large red arrow across her chart. She crossed her arms and seemed to draw in on herself. Ruby hoped she hadn't made her embarrassed. She found herself wondering where she could have possibly met the blue gem before.

When Rose Quartz stood and thanked everyone for their attendance and their devotion to the cause, Ruby realized the meeting had ended and she hadn't heard anything that was said. The words had seemed so distant.

Everyone began filing out. Ruby stood to join them, and nearly collided with the pearl. Ruby looked up to see her face, but it was expressionless.

"Rose Quartz would like to speak with you."

"N-now?" Ruby managed. The pearl nodded in response and gestured for Ruby to follow her. She locked eyes with the blue gem again when she passed her place at the table. Something about being so much closer to her this time made Ruby slightly weak at the knees.

She had always known Rose Quartz was larger than she was, but she hadn't realized standing in front of her would make her feel so small. She was half her height.

"Hello, Ruby." Rose Quartz's voice, directed at her, was perhaps the most beautiful thing she'd ever heard.

"Hi," she responded lamely.

"I was informed of what happened to you yesterday. Would you mind if I take a look at your gem?"

Ruby's immediate reaction was to pull her hand closer to her. Some part of her was afraid that she would be hurt again. After a moment's hesitation, she extended her hand to Rose Quartz. The scratch wasn't deep, but it did cross the entire surface in an (almost) perfectly straight line. Just looking at it made Ruby ache, but she'd seen far worse. She was in no position to complain.

"It isn't that bad. It doesn't even hurt that much. It'll heal on its own." She needed Rose Quartz to know she was strong, but standing before someone so powerful, the words only made her feel like a child.

"I will have you brought to the healing fountain tomorrow." She glanced briefly over Ruby's shoulder. "Sapphire will take you."

Ruby turned around to find that the blue gem had stood and moved closer, hands clasped in front of her. Her expression was inscrutable. She nodded and said nothing.

"I've heard so much about you," Rose Quartz began again, reclaiming Ruby's attention. "I wanted to thank you personally for all you've done for me, and for being here with us."

Despite how upset she was about being forced to stay behind, Ruby couldn't help but smile. She didn't know what to say.

"Please be prepared to leave first thing tomorrow." Ruby knew it was the blue gem--Sapphire--speaking before she turned around. "I'll come to your room to retrieve you."

Sapphire was smiling at her. Ruby would have smiled back if she hadn't already been.

"Okay."

Maybe she was a valuable member of the Crystal Gems after all.

Ruby almost didn't want to cry anymore.

~*~

It wasn't like it hadn't happened before.

Rubies were the most violent type of gem. Everyone knew that.

And for a ruby as hated as she was, she'd endured countless punishments in the past for her size.

But it had always been taboo to damage a ruby's gem. Ruby had regenerated more times than she could count because the other rubies had destroyed her form, but she'd never even _heard_ of… of anyone doing what had happened to her.

There had been three of them. And a dagger. They'd held her so she couldn't move and they'd cut into her gem. They probably would have killed her, split her gem completely, if they hadn't been discovered in time.

There was nothing else to really say. Ruby knew she'd probably deserved it.


	2. Chapter 2

The first thing Ruby heard was the sound of knocking on her door.

"Ruby? Is everything all right?"

The sound of Sapphire's voice woke Ruby immediately.

"Yeah, coming, sorry!" Ruby tripped over herself getting out of her bed and ran to get the door. She was in such a hurry that she grabbed the doorknob with her left hand by mistake.

"Ouch!" She hated to admit it, but her gem hurt much worse today. This meant that the crack wasn't healing on its own. She cradled her hand against her stomach and looked at Sapphire apologetically. "I was sleeping."

"You slept?"

"I didn't know how else to spend the time."

Sapphire nodded. "Are you ready to go?"

Ruby stepped into the hallway and closed the door behind her in response. Of course she was ready. Sapphire gestured for her to follow and walked off down the hallway. An uncomfortable silence persisted between them until Ruby couldn't stand it anymore.

"Will we be taking a warp pad?" Ruby asked.

"We can't. We don't want to risk revealing our location to any Homeworld gems that might be in the area. It's not like we have the ability to defend ourselves from attack right now."

"Why have the entire army leave without Rose Quartz? Why leave all the high-ranking officials here, defenseless?"

Sapphire frowned. "I'm not exactly at liberty to discuss that." She paused for a moment to let them out of the compound. Once they were outside, she added, "you're here, though."

"What?"

"You're here. So Rose Quartz isn't quite defenseless. And there are other gems left who are good in a fight. Like Pearl. I'm not very good, but I imagine that if I needed to protect Rose, I'd be..." She looked at Ruby, seemed to realize she was rambling, and finished meekly, "...capable."

Ruby let her ignorance about her uselessness slide, for now. She was starting to like this gem, and she didn't want her to know so soon. She smiled. "I'm sure you're fine in a fight. What's your weapon?"

"My weapon?" Indecision crossed Sapphire's face briefly. "I've never summoned it."

" _Seriously_? I've never met anyone who..." Ruby saw Sapphire fold her arms across her stomach and realized she'd embarrassed her again. "No, no, I'm sure you're fine! At fighting. I'm sure you're fine. If you want, I could practice with you sometime. I'm always looking to practice. Maybe we could figure out how to summon your weapon." Sapphire looked over at her, and Ruby realized she had lost track of what she was saying. "Sorry."

"I'd love to practice with you." Sapphire said. "The fountain is almost in sight."

Ruby looked around, but saw nothing but trees. She had been wrestling with a question since she and Sapphire had begun talking. Finally, she decided to ask it.

"I don't suppose you know how my gem got scratched, do you?"

"Yes."

Ruby's heart sunk. Part of her had hoped Sapphire wouldn't have heard those things. She didn't want this new gem to think of her that way. She tried her best to hide her disappointment and continued her line of inquiry.

"Do you know why Rose Quartz wanted me to stay behind? Was it because..." Ruby hesitated before pushing through to the end. "Was it because of what those gems said about me?"

"No. No. Of course not." Sapphire shook her head. "It was so you could be healed."

Ruby's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. "But it's just a scratch."

"It's much worse than you seem to think it is, Ruby. It's common practice to take wounded gems to Rose's fountain after battles to be healed. It has nothing to do with what they said about you."

Ruby accepted this explanation, even though it only seemed to raise more questions. Why had she been invited to the meeting, then? Why had she been given a room? Why hadn't she simply been taken to the fountain yesterday and healed in time to leave with everyone else?

"We're here, Ruby." Sapphire said. Surely enough, Ruby could just see the top of the stone fountain. "The proximity of Rose's fountain is large part of the reason we chose our current base of operations. It allows soldiers to easily be brought here for healing, and it means Rose can easily check on the fountain to ensure it's functioning properly."

"How does it work?"

"As a result of Rose's heritage, her tears have healing powers. The fountain contains the essence of Rose's healing tears."

"How long will it take?"

"Probably not longer than a few minutes."

Ruby had been wondering if it would hurt, to have her gem sewn back together. All concerns vanished the moment she approached the base of the fountain. The atmosphere here was as beautiful and peaceful as Rose Quartz's voice.

"Just place your hand in the fountain." Sapphire instructed.

From the moment the water covered the palm of Ruby's hand, she could see the damage mending. She smiled up at Sapphire. "It's working! Wait. You knew that."

Sapphire laughed. Ruby noticed that she was running her fingers over her own gem. "I'm sorry that happened to you." Her expression had grown somber. She looked as if she wanted to say something else. When she said nothing, Ruby broke the silence on her own.

"Hey! Your gem. I just realized. Your gem is on your hand, too. But on the other side."

Sapphire looked down at her hand as if she'd forgotten her gem was there. "Yes, I suppose so."

"I've never met anyone else whose gem was on their hand. Have you?"

"I've met you. Beyond that, no, I haven't either."

Ruby thought about that for a moment.

"I like you, Sapphire. I may not be glad this happened," she gestured to her hand, "but I'm glad I met you."

That seemed to cheer Sapphire up. When her hand was healed, they wordlessly began walking back towards the compound. They were silent, but it was different now.

Until--

"Get down." Sapphire pushed Ruby to the ground just as an arrow flew through the space her gem had once occupied.

"What--" Ruby dazedly struggled to her feet. Sapphire was already standing in front of her, frantically searching the trees. After a moment, she paused and pressed her hands to her forehead.

"There." She pointed at a spot to her right. Now that she'd been discovered, the gem who'd shot at them emerged from the trees.

"It's foolish of you to travel without a guard, Sapphire." There was an arrow pointed at Sapphire's gem. Ruby didn't understand what was happening, but even so, she did not hesitate.

"She does have a guard." Ruby pushed Sapphire behind her and summoned her gauntlets. She took stock of this new enemy. She was significantly taller than Ruby--but, then again, almost all gems were. Her gem was on her chest. Ruby was having trouble placing the type. Emerald, maybe? She had a quiver of arrows slung over one shoulder, and she wasn't close to running out. The challenge with this one would be getting close.

Sapphire said something behind her, but she didn't hear. She was already running. She rolled to avoid an arrow and came up directly in front of the gem, who had a very poor hold on her weapon, as Ruby was easily able to pull it from her and throw it to Sapphire. Before she could summon another one, Ruby punched her in the stomach hard enough to tear her form. She receded into her gem, which Ruby caught as it fell. Easy.

Sapphire ran up behind her.

"Are you okay?"

Ruby ignored her concern. "What do you want me to do with this?" She held up the gem. Sapphire pushed it aside.

"Ruby, are you hurt? Did she hurt you?"

Ruby frowned in confusion. "No, I'm fine."

"I... you didn't need to do that. You didn't need to do that. Why did you do that?" Her voice rose in pitch towards the end.

"I don't know, I didn't really think about it." Ruby answered honestly. "I just... did it. Seemed like the thing to do."

"It was my fault. I should have seen it coming. You shouldn't have had to risk your life for my mistake. I've just been so _distracted_ , I wasn't even looking! How did they find us? Do you still have her gem?"

"Yeah, here." Ruby tossed it to her. Sapphire encased it in a bubble, which then disintegrated into the air.

"We need to get back to the compound. Quickly." Sapphire took Ruby's hand and pulled her down the path after her.

"Wait--Sapphire, I don't even understand what just happened, can you please--can you please answer my questions? Sapphire?"

Sapphire ignored her. The hand that wasn't holding on to Ruby was pressed against her forehead. Her eyes were closed. She was humming softly to herself. Ruby wondered how she even knew where they were going if she couldn't see and tried not to feel hurt about being ignored.

Sapphire opened her eyes after a few minutes. She stopped walking and turned to look at Ruby.

"Ruby." Her voice and face were back to normal now, as if nothing had happened. "When we get back to the compound, I'm going to take you back to your room. I'm then going to talk to Rose Quartz. After I'm done, I'll come back to your room and I'll explain anything you want to know. Do you understand why I have to talk to Rose Quartz before I can answer you?"

Ruby nodded. She supposed she did.

Sapphire reached towards Ruby, hesitated, then pulled her into a hug. Ruby stiffened in surprise before returning the embrace.

"Thank you." Sapphire spoke so quietly Ruby wasn't sure if she'd even said anything.


	3. Chapter 3

It felt like she spent an eternity in her room while Sapphire talked to Pearl and Rose Quartz.

While she waited, she thought of all the things she wanted to know.

There were the obvious questions. Like why Sapphire was so highly ranked among the Crystal Gems, or how Sapphire had known they were being attacked, or why the green gem had known Sapphire's name. Now that Ruby thought about it, she thought the answers to those questions were probably related.

Ruby often found it difficult to make friends. It seemed she could never get her ideas out quickly enough. And she knew she fixated on things, and she knew other gems didn't really understand why she was like that. It also hadn't helped that all the other rubies had always hated her.

But Sapphire was so familiar–not only in the sense that there was something she recognized about her, but also in the sense that she was comfortable.

Ruby had been alone a long time, but she had never wanted anyone to like her and to be her friend more than she wanted Sapphire to. She wanted to be able to talk to Sapphire about _everything_ , all the time.

It was an inconvenient thing to want from someone who met her from hearing about the most humiliating moment of her life. An inconvenient thing to want from someone whose rank was so much higher than hers was. She wanted to know why Sapphire made her feel the way she did. She wanted to know what Sapphire's favorite things were.

When Sapphire appeared again in her doorway, Ruby had still been trying to decide which line of inquiry she would follow. She supposed she'd run out of time now.

"Hi," she said.

"Hi. May I come in?"

"Yes, yes, of course!" That's what Ruby should have spent her time doing while she waited. Tidying. Surely Sapphire's room was much cleaner than this. Given how few physical possessions Ruby owned, though, she supposed the mess could be considered a talent of sorts.

"How did your talk with Rose and Pearl go?" Ruby directed herself back to the topic at hand.

"Well. All went as planned. We have an hour here, and then I'll need you to come with me to the lawn. I'll be taking you up on the offer to practice summoning my weapon. I invited Pearl to join us. If you can defeat me, Pearl would like to see how you do against her, if you're comfortable with that."

"Pearl? What interest does she have in me?" Ruby had interpreted Pearl's reservedness yesterday as indifference.

"I've recommended you for a position. Among our circle. She wants to test your strength. And perhaps to get to know you better."

"Among your… circle? You work directly with Rose Quartz. You want me to… They want _me_?" Ruby's immediate response was to worry she'd perhaps done something wrong to give Sapphire the wrong impression; perhaps she'd overdone it when she'd defended her earlier, and now Sapphire was convinced she was actually _good_ in a fight.

"I do. And they will too, once they've seen what you're capable of." So it was about what Ruby had done earlier that day. At least Pearl would be able to sort Sapphire out, once she saw how misguided her assessment was. Pearl seemed like a no-nonsense kind of gem. "Don't worry about it," Sapphire continued, as if Ruby was uncertain of the outcome. "You'll do fine. I wouldn't have recommended you if I didn't know that. And you can practice against me a few times to get warmed up."

Ruby nodded, still considering her inevitable humiliation. She supposed she would have been frustrated if any other gem had done something so foolish, but she felt nothing but mild frustration towards Sapphire.

"There were other things you wanted to ask me?" Sapphire's question pulled her from her thoughts.

"Yes, sorry." She tried to focus, and decided to let her questions take the practical approach. "Why was that gem looking for you? Why did she say you shouldn't be traveling without a guard?"

"Are you aware of my position among the Crystal Gems, Ruby?"

Ruby shook her head. She tried to focus on what Sapphire was saying. She tried to focus, but her thoughts kept returning to Sapphire, and why she was so foolish, and why that didn't irritate Ruby like it should.

"...a rather rare gift, which makes me a great asset to her: I have future vision."

"What's future vision?" It seemed like the appropriate question to ask.

Of course Ruby had understood what Sapphire was saying, she was just– just–

Sapphire stopped talking.

"Have we met before?" The question seemed to fall out. Part of Ruby wished she could pick it back up, but another part of her desperately wanted to know what Sapphire would have to say.

But Sapphire only seemed shocked. "What? What makes you think that?"

Ruby struggled to explain without sounding like an idiot. "It's just, when I saw you at the meeting, you seemed so familiar. And you were looking at me. And I thought maybe you recognized me, too." It sounded so stupid.

"I… I don't think so."

"Oh." Ruby decided in that moment that her new life motto would be "never talk about emotions when you could be taking the practical approach".

"Wait. There is something. It'll sound very strange, though. I don't want you to…"

"You can tell me."

"The three days preceding what happened to you, I had the exact same dream. And it was about you. And what they did to you. I saw it."

This had not been what Ruby was expecting. Or hoping for.

"I thought you weren't real, and that what I'd seen wasn't real, because my future vision doesn't normally work like that." Sapphire continued. "That changed when the three gems that tortured you were brought before Rose, Pearl, and I for judgement. I recognized their story because I had seen it myself. So I had you brought here. I had you held back from the fighting, because I didn't understand why I saw a certainty with you, when my vision ordinarily works in probabilities. I wanted answers from you."

Sapphire had seen everything. It had been Sapphire who had prevented her from fighting, because she wanted something from her. Ruby thought unspoken in that sentence was probably the fact that Sapphire couldn't risk her being killed in the battle because of her size, and taking the answers with her. She didn't want to hear more, but Sapphire wasn't done.

"We may not have met in person before yesterday, but I feel like I know you, because of everything I've seen." Sapphire paused, as if waiting for a response. Ruby felt her initial frustration beginning to dissipate.

"Please. Say something."

Ruby just didn't want Sapphire to hate her like everyone else seemed to. She didn't want Sapphire to think badly of her because of what had happened. She turned to face Sapphire. She was so afraid.

"I didn't want you to see me like that. I had been hoping… This whole time, I had been hoping you hadn't even heard the story. But you saw it. What must you think of me?" Her voice quieted to a whisper by the end.

Ruby felt Sapphire take her hands. "I never speak in those meetings," Sapphire began, "but when I had to look at the faces of the gems who did that to you, I… I've never been so angry. I sent them to the front lines for the rest of the war. I might as well have sentenced them to death. They'll never hurt you again. All that seeing what happened has done is make me care about you so much now that I know you're real. And it's made me want to be your friend."

Ruby hated her tendency to immediately jump to the worst conclusion. She felt ashamed. There was a silence, in which Ruby realized she'd started to cry, wiped at her face, and tried not to feel foolish.

"Can I see it? Your gem?" Sapphire asked.

Ruby wasn't sure why she would want to, but she turned her hand over anyway. Sapphire lifted her fingers to touch, and Ruby's chest immediately clenched with anxiety.

"Is this okay?"

Ruby trusted Sapphire. She didn't want to be afraid.

"Yeah."

She felt half-okay about being touched when it was clear that Sapphire's hands wouldn't hurt her. Her eyes closed. Behind her fear, there was only exhaustion.

"I could have prevented this. I'm so sorry."

Ruby didn't open her eyes. "S'okay. Happens." She was barely awake. She wanted to fall asleep right here.

She almost did in the minutes they spent like that. Sapphire pulled away before she got the chance.

"We should probably go if you want to practice before you need to fight Pearl."

"Yeah."


	4. Chapter 4

Once they got to the yard, Ruby's thoughts shifted from how she might finally have an _actual friend_ to how a battle with Sapphire would work, if she didn't even know how to draw her weapon. She supposed Sapphire's ability to anticipate her every move would likely be enough of a weapon.

And Pearl. She didn't even know what Pearl's weapon was, or what her fighting style was like. She could imagine, though. Graceful. Quick. Maybe Pearl's weapon was also a bow.

Ruby was trying not to admit it to herself, but she was afraid Sapphire had overestimated her. She had seen Pearl fight before. She was afraid she couldn't win.

When they arrived on the lawn, Sapphire stepped back several paces and faced her.

"Ready when you are." She remained calmer and more poised than Ruby ever could. The excitement of fighting already coursed through her. She hated to admit it, but she loved this. She loved fighting.

She thought for a moment about how best to approach Sapphire. She decided to try a traditional approach first. She ran directly at Sapphire, who dodged at the last moment and grabbed her shirt as she ran by, unbalancing her. She fell to the ground. Instead of being frustrated as she ordinarily would be, she was smiling. Sapphire was good.

"I thought you said you were bad at this, because you can't draw your weapon." Ruby remarked as she pulled herself back to her feet and got ready to try again.

"I described myself as _competent_."

"Well, you certainly are that." Ruby dashed at Sapphire again, anticipated the dodge, spun behind her, and took both of Sapphire's hands in one of hers. She gently tapped one of her fists to Sapphire's back. "Poof. I win."

"Well done." Ruby jumped at the unexpected voice. She turned to see Pearl walking towards them. "Hello, Ruby. Sapphire speaks highly of you." She summoned her weapon as she walked. It was a spear. "Are you ready to see if she was right?"

Ruby nodded. She was as ready as she would ever be. She hadn't bothered with her weapon before, when it had just been her and Sapphire, but she summoned her gauntlets now. Sapphire stepped away from both of them, seating herself in the grass a safe distance away. Ruby took a moment to formulate a plan. It would be even more difficult to get close enough to Pearl to use her gauntlets than it was to get close to the green gem, because of the length of Pearl's spear and the fact that it didn't need to be reloaded.

She made the first move by running towards Pearl. In her experience with fighting, she had learned that her greatest advantage came when she was able to slip behind her opponent's defenses before they even had the opportunity to get warmed up.

Pearl was quick, though. Ruby had no confidence in her ability to dodge her spear. When she reached it, she grabbed the tip and the middle and snapped it like a twig. Pearl's eyes widened, but she flitted away before Ruby could grab her. She pulled two more spears from her gem, holding one in each hand. She turned and threw one of them at Ruby. While the spear was coming towards her, Ruby caught it and broke it in half, throwing the sharp end back at Pearl. Pearl dodged it easily.

Ruby knew they could both dodge each other forever. The key would be to trap Pearl, so she couldn't run away. She ran towards Pearl again, turning abruptly to the side. Pearl swung her spear to meet her. Ruby caught it and used its momentum to spin Pearl into one of her gauntlets, which caught her on the side. She let up on her force at the last moment, so she wouldn't destroy Pearl's form.

"Poof." Ruby let go of the spear. It was then that she noticed its other side was pointed directly at her stomach. A real fight would have gone to whichever of them could complete the motion to finish the other off first. Pearl was breathing hard.

She turned to Sapphire. "Well, she's convinced me. You were right about her." She offered Ruby her hand to take. "You're hired. It'll be a pleasure getting to know you."

Ruby took her hand. She didn't know what to say. "Thank you." she managed.

"I'm going to go inside and inform Rose."

Ruby nodded. She stared after Pearl as she walked away. Did this really mean she was just as good as Pearl? Just because they'd tied this one fight? Did this mean she was good enough to be... what was she now?

"Sapphire?" The blue gem had already been walking back to Ruby. "What position was it that you recommended me for, exactly?"

"Rose Quartz's guard."

Ruby wasn't sure if she'd heard correctly.

"You'll accompany Rose into every battle she fights in. You and Pearl together will serve as the final line of defense between Rose and any Homeworld gems that could seek to hurt her."

Ruby had heard correctly. She struggled to process this unanticipated turn of events. Just yesterday she'd been an obscure, friendless, defective, and relatively useless member of Rose Quartz's army. Now they wanted her for Rose's _personal guard_?

"Why me?"

"An abundance of reasons. For one thing, you're so strong. Most other rubies aren't nearly as strong as you are, which is what they try to compensate for with their larger size. But your smaller size also makes you quick and agile, a potent combination which makes you a skilled fighter and would make you a valuable asset to Rose. The thoughtlessness with which you defended me today demonstrates your loyalty and protectiveness, which are valuable and necessary qualities for anyone tasked with the protection of our leader."

Ruby sat on the ground and put her head in her hands. She couldn't believe how horribly Sapphire had overestimated her. _Any other ruby_ would be more qualified than she was. What if, by accepting this position, she put Rose Quartz in danger?

"Hey." Sapphire sat down next to her. "I've seen every possible outcome of this, and you're the perfect gem for the job. Do you trust me?"

"You really think I'm good enough?"

"Of course I do. And so does Pearl. You'll do great."

Ruby hoped she was right. She hoped it wasn't selfish of her to do this.

"If Rose wants me to, of course I'll do it." Ruby said. "I just don't want to let her down, or put her in danger."

"You won't." Sapphire stood up. "Do you want to practice again? We have a while before the meeting."

"Sure." Ruby put her gauntlets away and stood up. She didn't need them, and leaving them out only made it more likely that she would accidentally hurt Sapphire.

"Ready?"

This time, Sapphire made the first move.

Ruby found that she could only beat Sapphire rarely, when she made a move Sapphire's future vision had deemed unlikely. Even when she was able to surprise Sapphire, the other gem was usually able to turn the fight back in her favor. Sapphire didn't even seem to _need_ a weapon. It was almost as if--

"Ha!" Ruby stopped dead in her tracks.

Sapphire stopped, too, concerned. "What is it?"

"You said you've never been able to summon your weapon. What if that's because there's nothing to summon? What if your future vision _is_ your weapon?"

"Oh! I never thought of that before."

Ruby used her opportunity while Sapphire was distracted to aim a punch at her. She stepped back to avoid it almost as soon as Ruby's fist was in the air, her face still deep in thought. Ruby waited.

"You could actually be right," Sapphire said after a time. "I'll have to bring up the possibility with Pearl, but--but it would mean--"

"It would mean that you can use your weapon in battle just like anyone else."

"Yeah." When Sapphire smiled at her, Ruby couldn't help but smile back. Sapphire's ability to summon her weapon couldn't have mattered less to Ruby, except that it seemed important to Sapphire.

"We should probably head down to the meeting," Sapphire said.

"Yeah."

They walked in comfortable silence to the same room Ruby had been in the previous evening, where she'd seen Sapphire for the first time.

The nature of the position she'd been offered began to sink in when Sapphire led her up to the table at the front of the room. Sapphire seated her on her left, two seats away from Rose Quartz. It felt like everyone was watching her. She was used to being stared at, but she'd never been stared at like this before. She was glad Sapphire was here.

Immediately after Pearl opened the meeting, Sapphire stood.

"We've received intelligence of the _slightest_ possibility of a Homeworld attack on our base while our forces are away."

The gems in the audience stirred; everyone knew that if the Homeworld attacked here with the full force of their army, it would almost certainly mean the decimation of the rebellion.

"I cannot emphasize enough that this chance is _very remote_ ," she continued. "Still, we must prepare ourselves in the unlikely event that we are forced to defend Rose. Starting two days from now, no gems will be allowed outside the compound. In the meantime, we must scour the surrounding area and remove any evidence of our presence here. Even if Homeworld does try to attack us, they remain unaware of our precise location. You'll each receive specific assignments related to this task in the morning." Sapphire sat again when she finished. Ruby had heard none of this before. Clearly this had something to do with the green gem who'd found them earlier, and with Sapphire's future vision. Ruby resolved to ask Sapphire for more information later. Pearl stood to take Sapphire's place.

"The forces that left yesterday have met the Homeworld army, but neither side has attacked yet. The benefit of this is that we'd have warning if they were to pull back to attack us here, and that reinforcements would be forthcoming in such a situation."

"But," Sapphire chimed in, "it's also possible that they'll attack with a small number of reserve troops. In this case, we would likely be capable of defending our base with our current numbers."

But that meant there was a chance Ruby would have to fight. A tiny thrill went through her. Nothing would make her feel better about having to stay behind than having a real purpose to accomplish here, to protect Rose Quartz.

She hoped that didn't make her selfish.


	5. Chapter 5

The center of Pearl's spear caught Ruby in the chest and knocked the breath out of her. She landed on the ground, hard. Pearl extended a hand to help her up, but Ruby didn't take it.

Each consecutive defeat was making her increasingly frustrated. Surely Pearl must have figured out by now that this had been a bad idea.

"Are you ready to try again, Ruby?" Pearl's voice was pleasant and calm, which only served to irritate Ruby further. She should be more disappointed. She should be angry, too.

Ruby nodded.

Anger had always made Ruby careless. This fight was even shorter than the previous three. When it was over, Ruby stared up at the ceiling and wished she could break something.

Pearl's eyebrows furrowed in concern when Ruby didn't get up immediately. She sat down next to her.

"Is everything alright, Ruby?"

Ruby did her best to keep her frustration out of her voice. "What do you think?"

Pearl thought for a moment before she responded. "You're not a bad fighter just because I've had a lucky streak."

Ruby covered her face with her hands in hopes that it would hide her growing sense of despair from Pearl. "This was a bad idea."

"You're under no obligation to serve Rose Quartz in this capacity. Or in any capacity, really."

But Ruby couldn't let this go that easily. Pearl wasn't understanding. She needed Pearl to know why. Ruby deserved to hear the words from her own mouth, anyway, and to see the truth of them on Pearl's face.

"This was a bad idea because I'm not _qualified_. Any other ruby in the entire army would be a better choice than me."

Understanding dawned on Pearl's face. "This is about what happened to you. This is about the way the other rubies treat you."

"Can you pass me one of your spears?" Ruby asked in response. When Pearl summoned one from her gem and passed it to her, Ruby broke it in half and threw the broken ends at the wall as hard as she could. They both shattered against the stone. Pearl stared at the shards with wide eyes. There was a long silence.

Ruby broke it. "You made a mistake choosing me for this. You shouldn't want me, and neither should Rose Quartz." She stood up and began to walk away.

Pearl caught her arm. "Wait, Ruby."

Ruby turned back to her. She was glad she wasn't crying. Yet. Pearl sat up on her knees, which put her at eye level with Ruby.

"My decision still stands. Nothing I've seen today, or before today, has changed how I feel about your ability to protect Rose. We still have things we need to work on, like your confidence, and your… ah," she glanced at the broken pieces of her spear, "anger management skills, but that doesn't…" Pearl paused and sighed. "The things the other rubies said to you simply weren't true. You don't have to do this if you don't want to, but it should be for the right reasons."

Ruby tried to believe what Pearl was telling her. She looked at her feet. "I _do_ want to."

Pearl smiled.

~*~

Ruby now spent the majority of her days practicing with Pearl. The two of them were getting better and better at fighting alongside each other.

She still had trouble believing that in the course of the past few days, she'd made two friends: Pearl and Sapphire.

Ruby barely spoke with Sapphire during her first week as Rose's guard. Part of the reason was that Ruby had been so busy practicing with Pearl, and the other part had been that she needed time to process what Sapphire had told her about her dream.

Ruby had just been so busy practicing with Pearl, Sapphire had so often slipped her mind. When she did think of Sapphire, her mind would often become preoccupied with the same questions.

She wondered how much Sapphire had seen of what happened. She wondered whether she should feel violated. Because she didn't.

Perhaps that was because she knew Sapphire couldn't control what she saw. Maybe it was also because Sapphire seemed to like her anyway, despite everything she knew.

Perhaps a part of Ruby _had_ been avoiding her. Sapphire's opinion was so terrifyingly important to her, Ruby struggled to cope with the fear that Sapphire would find out too much, that she wouldn't like what she saw.

In any case, Ruby found she missed Sapphire. Every day since she'd begun practicing with Pearl, Ruby had begged her to let her go to the fighting practices Sapphire had been organizing in preparation for the possible attack. Pearl had finally agreed to accompany her today.

Ruby was lucky to have caught Sapphire between fights. She didn't want to wait.

"Ready?" She asked.

Sapphire looked up. Ruby saw the smallest smile on her face. "I think you should be more worried about yourself."

In the time since Ruby had fought Sapphire, she'd put a lot of thought into how she might be able to get around her future vision. At length, Ruby had come up with a possible strategy, and that was to make Sapphire as confused as possible.

When Sapphire tried to unbalance her this time, she was ready. She caught the front of Sapphire's dress and pulled her down with her. Sapphire landed on one of her gauntlets, but didn't seem to be hurt.

"I win." She smiled up at Sapphire. The sound of other gems clapping for her felt like nothing else ever had. Sapphire climbed off her and offered her a hand up. Ruby vanished her gauntlets and took it. She tried to follow Sapphire to the edge of the room, but she wouldn't let her.

"Go fight more," Sapphire said. "You should practice."

Ruby tried not to let the dismissal make her feel like Sapphire didn't want to spend time around her. Pearl motioned for her to come and practice with her. Ruby focused her feelings into her fight with Pearl. Their battle lasted so long that by the time they'd finished (Ruby won), the room had cleared.

She looked over at Sapphire, hoping she'd seen, and saw that her head was in her hands and her shoulders were tense. Something was wrong.

She hesitated for a moment when she reached Sapphire, unsure of how best to get her attention. She rested her hand lightly on her shoulder and knelt.

"Sapphire?"

Sapphire opened her eyes. Her gaze was unfocused and disoriented. She struggled to her feet.

"I saw something. It's just a small party. Nothing we can't handle. Twenty or so. They aren't coming for Rose. They're coming for me."

The tone of Sapphire's voice alone made Ruby's stomach drop, despite the fact that it took her a moment to piece together what she'd said. When she did, she was frozen with shock and fear.

Pearl recovered first. "What? Are you sure? That's not possible, they don't even know about you."

"They must. The gem we captured, she said… She wondered why I wasn't traveling with a guard. I didn't say anything before, because I didn't want you to worry."

Sapphire looked up at them and seemed to realize that both of them already were. "It's okay, though," she tried to reassure them. "They don't know Rose is here. They don't know anything about Rose. It's okay."

They were coming for Sapphire.

"I need to speak with Rose," Pearl said. Ruby could hear the anxiety in her voice.

"Wait! You have to tell her to leave. You can't let her stay and fight. If she does, and a single Homeworld gem gets away to tell the rest where she is, it'll almost certainly mean her death."

They were coming for Sapphire. Homeworld wanted Sapphire. Homeworld wanted to hurt Sapphire.

Now that Pearl was gone, more of the stress was showing on Sapphire's face. Ruby forced her fear off of her own.

"Don't worry, Sapphire." She said. "There are plenty of us here to protect you. You probably won't even need to fight."

How many had Sapphire said were coming? Twenty? Ruby would tear every one of them apart.

"I need you to stay with me. I don't want you to leave my side until the fighting starts."

The thought that Sapphire wanted to spend time with Ruby made her face flush. It would not be a difficult request to accommodate, seeing as Ruby would not be leaving Sapphire even afterwards.

"I'll stay," she responded. "We should go and talk to Pearl and Rose. We need to make a plan."

Ruby needed to make a plan. Ruby needed to keep Sapphire far away from this, far from anyone who could hurt her or take her away. Sapphire was Ruby's first friend, and she was not about to let anything happen to her.

It was Sapphire herself who supplied Ruby's plan. When they arrived at Rose and Pearl's room, she immediately joined Pearl in persuading Rose to stay away from the fight.

"I know you don't want to leave us to fight for you," Sapphire said, "but if Homeworld discovers our ruse, far more gems will be at stake than those that could perish in this battle. For the good of the gems that follow you, Rose, please, you have to sacrifice your own wishes this time."

They weren't even coming for Rose, they were coming for Sapphire. It would make sense to leave Sapphire with Rose.

When the thought had fully formulated, Ruby spoke immediately. "I think you should stay with Rose, Sapphire."

Sapphire turned to her. Ruby could see the resistance in the way her hands, clasped in front of her, tightened. But Ruby also knew Sapphire would have no choice now. To disagree would undermine everything she'd just asked Rose to do.

"You're right, Ruby." Sapphire finally said. Ruby felt the tension uncoil inside of her. "At least that means that if they do find Rose, I'll be there to protect her."

Now all Ruby needed to worry about was ensuring that didn't happen.

"We need to have a meeting to tell everyone. Tonight," Pearl said. "When do you think they're most likely to arrive, Sapphire?"

"Midday tomorrow. Possibly morning, possibly night. There are only twenty. We outnumber them two to one."

It would be an easy fight. Sapphire would be safe. It was going to be okay.

"I'll gather everyone." Pearl said.

"I'm just going to check--" Sapphire started. She cut off abruptly, her energy visibly fading. She took a deep, exasperated breath. "I need to sleep."

"I'll take you back to your room." Ruby reminded herself of what Sapphire had told her before–she needed to sleep if she used her future vision too much. This was normal.

"Okay." Sapphire's voice was so small.

There was only one thing left to check on. "Pearl. If I take care of Sapphire, will you find a place for her and Rose to hide?" Ruby asked.

Pearl seemed to understand. She nodded. "Get some rest, Sapphire."

Ruby guided Sapphire out of the room.


	6. Chapter 6

Ruby couldn't be more glad Sapphire would be staying with Rose Quartz. She didn't want to have to worry about her being hurt or captured or killed.

That left her free to worry about other things.

Ruby hoped everything was okay. Sapphire stopped walking and leaned against a wall to rest.

"What's going on, Sapphire? Are you sure you can walk? I can carry you, if you want. You'll be needing your energy."

"I'm fine, I just…" Sapphire pushed herself up off the wall and grabbed onto Ruby, leaning on her heavily. "It exhausts me when I use my future vision too much, remember? I'm sorry I tired myself out, I'm normally much more careful about this."

"It's okay. You're doing great."

Ruby hadn't known Sapphire's room was in the same hallway as hers until she pointed out her door. As soon as she was inside, she collapsed on her bed.

"Do you want me to leave so you can sleep?"

"No. I want you to be with me when they come. Please stay."

"Okay," Ruby agreed. Sapphire laid down in her bed. Ruby wasn't sure what to do, so she sat on the floor next to it.

Sapphire turned over a few times, trying to get comfortable. After a moment, Ruby felt Sapphire's hand on her shoulder.

"What is it?" she asked.

"I need--" Sapphire reached down and fumbled until she found one of Ruby's hands. Something about it made Ruby feel fluttering in her chest.

Ruby thought Sapphire had fallen asleep until she spoke.

"I'm not making you uncomfortable, am I? I just want to know you're safe."

Ruby said nothing. It was a little uncomfortable, but not for the reason Sapphire feared, only because her arm was twisted at an awkward angle. She felt a sort of giddy nervousness at what she was about to do, but she did it anyway: she let go of Sapphire's hand and climbed up onto her bed.

"This is better." She took Sapphire's hands in hers. "I'm right here. Go to sleep."

Ruby watched as Sapphire relaxed and her breathing slowed.

It's difficult to say what caused Ruby's enlightenment–perhaps it was that her gem was touching Sapphire's. Perhaps it was how vulnerable Sapphire had allowed herself to be. Perhaps it was how long she lay awake there, with her feelings that were becoming increasingly difficult to ignore.

Sapphire was everything Ruby was, and everything she wished she was. Sapphire was instantly familiar and correct. Sapphire was terrifyingly beautiful.

Ruby neither understood nor recognized the way she felt; it was almost as if she'd found something that had been lost. She didn't understand how she could already be willing to sacrifice so much to keep her safe. Perhaps it was because Sapphire was the first gem who had ever taken her seriously. Perhaps it was because Ruby was coming to the conclusion that staying with Sapphire as she slept, here and now, was the only time she had ever felt safe.

She supposed she'd always sensed something different about the way she felt about Sapphire. But it didn't make sense; Ruby barely knew her.

She wasn't sure what she wanted from Sapphire, and yet also already knew she wanted everything this gem could offer her.

Despite what she knew about herself, Ruby had the most fleeting hope that perhaps Sapphire might feel similarly. She thought of how she'd been in Sapphire's dreams before they met; surely that meant something.

But there was the far larger part of her that knew she was kidding herself.

She was the smallest ruby in Rose Quartz's army. She was a disgrace. She could not expect to be--to be _what? Loved?_ \--by Sapphire.

The thought of love was so brilliant and so terrifying that it seemed to burn inside of her. She pushed it far away, for now.

All that mattered was ensuring that Sapphire survived the following day.

~*~

Ruby woke to the sound of Sapphire's voice. It took her a moment to realize she wasn't in her own room, and to remember what had happened the previous day. The realization brought her immediately and fully awake.

"Are they here?" Ruby asked.

"No, no, don't worry. We have a few hours still."

Ruby nodded and felt some of the stress leave her. She sat up. It was only then that she realized she was still holding one of Sapphire's hands. She let go of it quickly. What did Sapphire think of what she'd done the night before?

Ruby distracted herself. "We need to find out if Pearl found a place for you and Rose."

"Okay."

Ruby climbed out of Sapphire's bed. She glanced behind her to ensure that Sapphire was following her, and made her way towards Rose and Pearl's rooms.

Pearl seemed to understand the urgency Ruby felt to protect Sapphire. Ruby would be fighting alongside Pearl immediately outside the room where Sapphire and Rose hid. She and Pearl would be directly responsible for their safety. Ruby was glad for this; she wouldn't have trusted the task to anyone else.

Ruby was glad Sapphire had asked to stay with her, so Ruby wouldn't have to. Something about the knowledge that there were gems who wanted to hurt Sapphire was deeply horrifying to Ruby, and she had no intentions of allowing Sapphire to leave her sight until she was certain that it was safe.

When Sapphire saw that the search party was nearly upon them, Ruby waited with her for the fighting to begin. Sapphire held her hand. The anticipation had always been the worst part of battles. Despite the fact that this one would be on a much smaller scale, the fear was the same. Especially because they were coming for Sapphire.

The signal. Pearl was gone before Ruby was able to process what she'd heard. They'd arrived. It was time. She stood to go, but felt Sapphire hold her back. The next thing she knew, Sapphire was hugging her tightly.

The same feeling from last night resurfaced in her–the same one that made Ruby feel brave and terrified all at once. She pulled back to look at Sapphire's face. Something about the sense of impending doom made it feel inevitable and natural when Ruby leaned in and kissed her.

Several things happened at once in Ruby's mind. Ruby decided that Sapphire was the most perfect and beautiful gem she had ever met. And she realized she could never deserve Sapphire. Sapphire was too good for a defective gem like Ruby, and Sapphire made her happier than she deserved.

She wrapped her arms around Sapphire's waist and allowed herself to have this one moment.

And then she pulled away.

"Stay here, Sapphire." She said. She turned and left without looking back. She could protect Sapphire. That's what she was _made_ to do. She was made to protect more important gems.

The room where Rose and Sapphire were hidden was situated on a corner. There were only two hallways for Pearl and Ruby to defend; one for each of them. Pearl was at the edge of the left hallway, looking around the corner. Ruby ran down the hallway on the right. She drew her gauntlets. Not one could get away. Not one.

When she reached the end, Ruby stopped and looked around the corner as Pearl had done. Further down, the hallway was a frenzy of activity, but it was quiet here. For now. The first handful of Homeworld gems that came towards her were easy to pick off–she would grab them as they went by and crush their gems to powder.

The frenzy of battle had already come over her, such that she did not fully consider what she was doing. She'd become desensitized to death long ago.

Pearl and Ruby held the hallway easily until the fusion found them.

It came on Pearl's side first.

"Incoming, Ruby!" Pearl shouted. Ruby turned around, thinking that a gem had slipped past Pearl's guard, in time to see a giant hand grip the corner of the hallway. Pearl fell back several steps.

"What's Rose's pet pearl doing here?" the fusion asked herself.

"We must be close." She answered in a different voice.

From what Ruby could see, she was a fusion of at least five gems. She was all arms, legs, eyes, and mouths.

Pearl pulled a second spear from her gem and twirled them both. She threw one of them, which lodged itself in a gem on the fusion's forehead. The fusion glowed white and spit out the dead gem, then reformed slightly smaller than before.

Pearl tried to use her spear, but she couldn't get close enough, the fusion had too many arms. She fell back even further. She was only a few feet away from the door they were guarding. Ruby was frozen in place. She'd never fought anything so big.

"Ruby, we need to–" Pearl started. She was impaled mid-sentence by a knife in her stomach. She cried out in surprise and receded into her gem.

Ruby could not afford to stand still any longer. She ran forward and kicked Pearl's gem to the side of the hall, where it would be safe. She took a few steps back from the fusion to make sure it would follow her. When it moved to pursue her, Ruby took off at a run down the hallway. She needed to get this thing away from Sapphire and Rose before she fought it.

When she turned to face the fusion, Ruby wished she would have thought this out better. She had never felt more small than she did now. Her entire body was the size of one of the fusion's hands. Her own hands felt tiny in comparison. She didn't know how much her gauntlets would be able to do against a gem this size.

At least, as small as she was, she was able to see Sapphire when she came around the corner. Sapphire was holding one of Pearl's spears. She looked even smaller than Ruby felt.

_No, no, no!_

"Ruby!" Sapphire called. Ruby felt horror rising within her as the fusion turned towards Sapphire.

"Get out of here!" she screamed.

It was too late. The fusion had already lost interest in Ruby.

"That's Sapphire," she said. Then, in another voice, "remember, Yellow Diamond wants her alive."

They recognized Sapphire. For a moment, she was consumed by panic, until she heard the fusion scream above her. She saw that Sapphire had thrown the spear she was holding and taken out another of its gems.

"Come on, Ruby!" she called, but Ruby was already running to her. She grabbed Sapphire's hand and pulled her down the hall, away from the fusion.

"They're going to fuse again, and they're going to chase after us." Sapphire's voice was calmer than it had any right to be. "We need to hide."

Ruby trusted Sapphire's future vision better than her own judgement. She nodded. She spotted an alcove shielded by a toppled bookcase. She picked Sapphire up and tossed her behind it, then climbed in after her.

It didn't take long for the fusion to reach them. Ruby tried to force down her frustration when Sapphire pushed Ruby behind her, as if Ruby was the one who needed protecting.

"I hear you, Sapphire." Something about the fusion's chorus of voices was deeply unsettling to Ruby, perhaps the most unsettling thing she'd ever heard. She searched her mind desperately for anything they could do.

"Fuse with me." She whispered it as soon as the thought occurred to her, almost to herself. Sapphire heard her anyway. She stared at Ruby for a moment, as if she was processing what Ruby had asked.

"Okay." Sapphire agreed.

They bowed to each other. Sapphire reached for Ruby. It started as a simple waltz, then Ruby twirled her, dipped her, and they were enveloped in white light.


	7. Chapter 7

Garnet wasted no time summoning her gauntlets.

 _Are you ready?_ Sapphire asked.

 _Yeah,_ Ruby responded.

_Do you see it?_

_Yes,_ Ruby thought. _Tell me which way to go._

The fusion had found her. Something about being twice Ruby or Sapphire's height made it much more difficult for Garnet to hide.

 _Under_.

Garnet jumped out from behind the bookcase and rolled between the fusion's legs. There was a gem on the base of the fusion's back. She made direct contact with it, put a crack across its face, and landed on her feet. The kick would come from the left. Garnet stepped back to avoid it.

 _We need to get around again,_ Ruby said. _We've already weakened that one._

Sapphire agreed. _Jump now._

Garnet did, landing on the fist that had tried to hit her. She climbed up to the fusion's shoulder and dropped off its back. She hit the gem again. It shattered this time.

The fusion broke apart. A red and a yellow gem landed on either side of the gem shards.

 _Left or right first?_ Ruby asked.

 _Right_.

The yellow gem. Garnet didn't need to destroy this one. She brought a fist down on her head as she tried to stand, and her form disappeared with a poof. Garnet bubbled her and turned to the red gem.

She seemed to realize that there was little hope for her. She tried to run, but Garnet chased her and caught up with her easily. _It's nice to be tall_ , she thought. She pinned the red gem to the wall and tore her gem from her body, which disintegrated. She bubbled the gem.

She looked for any surviving Homeworld gems. There was only one.

_Let's go._

Garnet found the gem trying to get into the room where Rose was hiding. Rose must have been holding the door shut from the other side. Garnet tore the gem in half. She was realizing with some satisfaction that she was stronger even than Ruby.

"It's me, are you okay?" Garnet asked through the door, before realizing she spoke with neither of Sapphire or Ruby's voices, so Rose wouldn't recognize her. "I mean…" Garnet tried to explain, but grew frustrated. She pulled the door open by force, pushed Rose out of the way, and closed it behind her. Rose shielded herself and backed away, towards her sword. She was holding Pearl's gem.

"Who are you?" Rose asked. Pearl's gem glowed and she burst forth from it, form completely unchanged, and drew her spear.

"Garnet. I'm Ruby and Sapphire. The battle is over. The gem outside your door was the last one." Garnet said.

"Ruby and Sapphire?" Pearl asked. She stepped forward to examine her. "But you're so stable! The only fusion I've ever seen half as stable is--" Pearl cut herself off and flushed.

"Ours," Rose finished for her. "Perhaps Sapphire and I were right."

"Right about what?" Garnet asked. That was when Ruby saw it.

There hadn't only been one dream. There had been _thousands_. Sapphire had seen _everything_. And she--she--

Sapphire did not even have a moment to love Ruby as Garnet. Ruby's self-hatred caught her off guard and overwhelmed her.

_You can't love me. I don't want you to._

~*~

Ruby's head hurt. Her body hurt. She curled in on herself and struggled to contain her horror.

There were thousands of memories. It seemed Sapphire had dreamed about every important thing that had ever happened to her. Her worst moments were there. The dreams stretched back almost as far as Ruby could remember.

She heard footsteps approaching her. She just wanted to be left alone. She just wanted to be alone.

"I should have told you," Sapphire said. "I just didn't want to overwhelm you. I just didn't want to... " She trailed off. Ruby wanted to scream. "I didn't want to make you uncomfortable."

Regardless of how much Ruby hated herself, she couldn't bring herself to be angry with Sapphire. She had to get out of here before she did anything she would regret. She made a frustrated sound, got up, and ran.

She almost made it back to her room before she started crying. The other gems around her were too preoccupied with cleanup to notice. When she got into her room, she couldn't contain her frustration. She punched a wall. It made a hole. She didn't feel much better afterward.

She missed Sapphire so much already, so much it hurt. But she didn't know if she could ever face her again.

She knew Sapphire couldn't control what she saw. It wasn't that.

It was that Sapphire had seen all of it and she loved Ruby _anyway_.

The concept was so unfathomable, so _repugnant--_ and the worst thing was that she wanted it. She wanted Sapphire to like her. She was sickeningly happy to know Sapphire felt this way. How selfish.

She curled up again on her bed. She didn't have the energy for anything else.

No one bothered her.

~*~

She couldn't stay away long.

Perhaps it was that she was so lonely. Perhaps it was that Sapphire was so beautiful. Perhaps it was because she was so selfish, she _wanted_ to be happy, she wanted to believe that Sapphire loved her. She wanted to believe she deserved it.

She knocked on Sapphire's door. She wondered how long it had been–hours or days–or if she would even find Sapphire there. She almost hoped she wouldn't. But the door opened, and there she was.

"Can I come in?" Ruby asked.

Surprise crossed Sapphire's face, and was gone just as quickly. "Yeah."

Ruby stepped inside. She knew what she'd come here to say, but now that she was standing here about to say it, the words didn't want to come. Sapphire sat on her bed and waited.

"I guess I just wanted to apologize," Ruby started. "I wasn't mad at you, I was just… Mad at myself." She couldn't bring herself to make eye contact with Sapphire, so she looked at the floor instead.

Now for the scarier part. "I also wanted to ask… Well, I don't know, if it'll ever… But I want…"

She wrung her hands together, wishing her words didn't always get twisted around in her head like this when she spoke. She took a deep breath and tried again.

"I want to try being Garnet again," she managed. "I understand if you don't want to… deal with all of _that_." There was so much _that_. She pushed forward. "And that's okay if you don't, but I--"

Sapphire took her hands. Ruby looked up at her.

"If you want to try again, so do I." She almost looked happy.

Ruby smiled back, or tried to.

She was worried about so many things--how she could only ever focus on one thing at a time, how she had never done anything like this before, whether she truly deserved this--but she had a feeling it would all be okay, as long as Sapphire was there to help her through it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading! Feel free to leave feedback and to check out "Love Takes Time" if you haven't already! [Here's](http://archiveofourown.org/works/4298874/chapters/9742203) a link to the first chapter.


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